Ushering

Mrs. Myrtle Standich arrived at the Kalesburg Community Theatre on Sunday afternoon at exactly ten till four o'clock pm. Mrs. Myrtle Standich was meeting Mr. David Tanner and Mrs. Greta Perdue, a near-relative of the renowned frozen chicken innovators. For five years running, these three have volunteered their time as ushers in order to see the performances for free. Sunday's show was Peer Gynt by Mr. Henrik Ibsen.

Mrs. Myrtle Standich, Mr. David Tanner, and Mrs. Greta Perdue were all in agreement that if the show had not been free, they would not have attended. It was not that the show was particularly poor. The script was workable. Mr. David Tanner said that Mr. Henrik Ibsen has done better and, therefore, expected more. But, Mrs. Myrtle Standich and Mrs. Greta Perdue felt that the script was beautiful. Said Mrs. Greta Perdue, "It was a delight to hear some of the words. I was unaware that a few of them even existed." The actors, particularly Mr. Roland Sims in the title role, were serviceable. So, the production itself had merit.

It was in the treatment of the volunteer staff that the Kalesburg Community Theatre fell short. Mr. David Tanner had requested the position of ticket taker, on the account of a lack of desire to be a seat usher. This should have been guaranteed to him due to the fact that he was the first to ask for the position. Instead, the job went to Mrs. Estelle Havord whom all present knew received the coveted position because of her familial bond with the house manager, Mr. Frank Havord. Mr. David Tanner shouted "I did not storm the beaches of Normandy to come home and be forced to walk people to their seats sixty years later!" Mr. Frank Havord pointed out that Mrs. Estelle Havord had weak legs and was forced to use a walker. But, Mr. David Tanner retorted, "She walks fine when she wants to!" Mrs. Myrtle Standich and Mrs. Greta Perdue agreed.

This injustice aside, there was also a failure to reward the volunteer staff in the seating arrangement. There were only two spots available in the floor seating. Thus, even though there stood a history of five years of sitting side by side, Mr. David Tanner was asked to sit up in the third row of the balcony. Mr. David Tanner refused to climb the stairs as his knees were weak on the account of his storming the beaches at Normandy. This seemed of no interest to the house manager and grandson of Mrs. Estelle Havord, Mr. Frank Havord. He was determined to split the trio up. Mr. David Tanner asked rather brazenly, "Did you ever storm the beaches of Normandy?" When Mr. Frank Havord did not respond, Mr. David Tanner repeated, "Did you?" When Mr. Frank Havord again did not respond, Mr. David Tanner repeated the question again with more fervor. This time, Mr. Frank Havord answered, saying, "No. I did not ever storm the beaches of Normandy. But, I still need someone to sit in the balcony." Mr. David Tanner countered by calling Mr. Frank Havord, "a facist".

Mrs. Myrtle Standich quickly volunteered to sit in the balcony the moment she realized that this argument could only end in a most disruptive fashion. This act kept the production on time and gave both Mr. Frank Havord and Mr. David Tanner a moment to cool their egos. On the way out the theatre, there was talk of whether or not the trio would come back and serve. Mr. David Tanner still seemed a little flushed in the face. All agreed that there had been injustices displayed. But all were also in understood that they had nothing to replace Sunday afternoons with if volunteering at the Kalesburg Community Theatre were cut from their schedules.