Mr. Buttons

Mrs. Myrtle Standich had tea with a distressed Mrs. Iris Fountain. Also in attendance were Mr. and Mrs. Howard Kennedy and Mrs. Janet Wyman. The reason for Mrs. Iris Fountain's distress was the passing of her tabby cat, Mr. Buttons. Mr. Buttons was twelve at the time of his passing. Mrs. Myrtle Standich and Mrs. Janet Wyman consoled Mrs. Iris Fountain for upwards of fifteen minutes. Mrs. Janet Wyman had said she understood what Mrs. Iris Fountain was going through as her Siamese cat, Cleo(catra), had passed away only two months before. Mrs. Myrtle Standich agreed that it was a sad occasion.

When Mrs. Iris Fountain had regained her normally pristine composure, she took a sip of her Earl Grey and whispered, “At least he’s in Heaven.” It was at this point that Mr. Howard Kennedy, who had previously remained uncomfortable and silent, chimed, “We don’t know that for sure. The Bible says nothing about animals going to Heaven.” Mrs. Howard Kennedy placed her hand on Mr. Howard Kennedy's and said, “Now Howard, why would you say something like that?” To which Mr. Howard Kennedy replied, “It’s the truth.” “But still,” is all Mrs. Howard Kennedy managed to say in return. Mrs. Iris Fountain returned to her tearful depression, refusing Mrs. Myrtle Standich’s plea to have another sip of Earl Grey.

Mrs. Janet Wyman entered the argument with, “If we don’t know, there is still a possibility that Mr. Buttons and Cleo(catra) are both in Heaven. I think all living things go to Heaven.” In response, Mr. Howard Kennedy attempted to compromise with, “Well, I could see maybe seeing eye dogs going to Heaven.” Mrs. Myrtle Standich once again attempted to get Mrs. Iris Fountain to sip her Earl Grey. Mrs. Iris Fountain swore she would never drink Earl Grey again, “or any tea for that matter,” until she knew Mr. Buttons was in Heaven. It was obvious to all, including Mr. Howard Kennedy, that this was the sorrow talking and not Mrs. Iris Fountain. It was decided that it was best to leave Mrs. Iris Fountain to her thoughts.

Once outside, Mrs. Myrtle Standich and Mrs. Janet Wyman agreed to pray that the next day found Mrs. Iris Fountain less dramatic. Mrs. Myrtle Standich and Mrs. Janet Wyman also made a pact not to invite Mr. Howard Kennedy to tea ever again.